Dear George,
According to one of our missionaries, Elvis has been spotted in Baghdad. Our missionary reports that Presley was extremely angry as he had just been missed by one of your bombs in the No-Fly Zone. Our missionary further reports that Presley made this chilling prediction; "Tell that tee-totalitarian tyrant Beelzebush & his butt-sniffing buddy Tony the Lionfart that if anything happens to me during the coming offensive the Southern States will rise up under a big fan of mine Bill Clinton & start a new Civil War. Adolf Hitler fought a war on two fronts & all sane people know what happened to him & his associates." According to our missionary Presley then disappeared into a shady night-club where he is acting as a part-time human shield for a trio of local belly-dancers.
Yours sincerely
Lord Biro
